Running over listeners with a car
If you’ve ever attended a parade, you undoubtedly stood on the sidewalk and watched the parade pass. This is the way parades work. Spectators step aside and allow the parade to pass unobstructed. In New Orleans, it doesn’t work this way. Spectators stand in the road. The parades of course, are Mardi Gras parades - and I drove a vehicle in about 20 over 3 years. Literally tens of thousands come out to watch these parades, each attendee screaming for a "throw." Each parade unit would be filled to the brim with doubloons, cups, beads & trinkets. My job was to drive and throw. I always threw plastic cups with my picture on them. People would beg for them screaming, "Pleeeeeezzee???" I’d then whip one their way - aiming for the center of their forehead. Most met the mark. The cup would bounce off their head leaving a round red mark - and since they’d been drinking since 9am - they shouted, "Thanks!" Every parade I ran over someone. I know what you’re thinking, "yeah right." No - I actually ran over dozens of people - as in - down in the road, and my tires running over their bodies. Apparently alcohol is an amazing pain killer - as most immediately jumped up waiting to be run over again. What was I to do? I’m in a car, surrounded by thousands of screaming drunk people, I’d honk, press on the gas, and THUMP THUMP - there’s another. The first few casualties upset me. I’d never run over anyone before, but this was just part of the party. These people came here expecting to be run over. That’s why they watch parades from the middle of the parade route instead of the sidelines. Who was I to rob the parade watchers of their chance to be run over by Brian Pierce? My company knew I’d run over people. They knew it all along. That’s why my parade unit was always a Volkswagen bug.
